This summer I went bouldering with a small group of my coworkers, all women, on Donner Summit. My friend Zoe, an experienced climber, had organized it. Some of the women who went had never even climbed before. Mostly when I climbed there were almost all guys there and a guy always led or set up the climb. This was the first time I had climbed with all women, I realized that I felt a lot less pressure and that I could just enjoy the climb. This day was when I first heard the term "boyfriended". My friend, the climber, began telling me about how she met her boyfriend and how she was drawn to pictures of him climbing. She reached out to him because she was intrigued by his climbing skills and saw herself having a lot of adventures together. "I was pretty much boyfriended into climbing. I feel like most girls who climb are." she said. As much as I wanted to disagree with her, I too, was boyfriended into climbing. It wasn't something I was forced to do, it was something I had wanted to do for a really long time but didn't have the skills or the equipment to do. I personally don't have that many guy friends, considering most guys don't just want to be your friend. So, most of my friends are girls. Only one of them owns a rope, and she hasn't yet learned to lead or trad climb. We've also never gone outside climbing together.
The other week my boyfriend and I were driving talking about his co-workers, "I like the guys that I work with," he said, "..but it seems like the only hobby that the girls I work with have is getting drunk." he added. I wondered how that could be in a place like Tahoe? I may not know the exact reason why we don't see more women outdoors leading a trad climb or groups of women skinning up Tallac very often, but it seems like women have a hard time finding someone to teach them.
It is hard to learn how to be an avid climber or learn to tour, ski, and/or snowboard without first having the money to invest in these things. So if you want to pick up one of these sports, you have to have the money to do so - or you borrow a friends gear in order to learn. If you're lucky, you grow up doing these activities with your family. If you're a guy in Tahoe, you probably have friends who already do these things and who can teach you. If you're a girl, the amount of friends you have who are proficient in these activities may be slim to none, so if you want to learn you either A. invest in equipment and lessons or B. find a guy who will teach you and hopefully not try to get in your pants in the process.
Although there are women out there who are proficient in touring and climbing, they don't always tend to be great mentors. I've known many girls who, for lack of a better word, think that it makes them better than other girls that they can do these things, or that it makes them more special because they're the only girl who can "hang with the guys". This kind of competitive attitude is what prevents women from teaching and mentoring each other in the outdoors, and has resulted in a lack of sisterhood in the outdoors.
This is why it is important to let a friend borrow that old pair of skis, or take that friend climbing who has never gone before. And especially to not be condescending when you're teaching them a knot or a technique, but instead praising them for learning something new and getting outside of their comfort zones. We still live in a mans world but only because we are allowing it. We can't keep holding ourselves back and second guessing ourselves, and we must, must, must encourage each other and help each other to find ourselves in the outdoors. When I get to the top of a climb, I forget about all of my insecurities. Or when I glide on powder on my snowboard it makes me feel completely free. I want all women to feel that way.
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